Category Archives: ABC’s The Bachelorette

Y’all, I don’t know if I am missing JJ or was just too drunk to write the post after the amount of wine consumed on Monday. (Yes, I’m old, three days of recovery is needed) – just kidding. But I can tell you right now any family I meet/bring a boy home – the wine will sure be flowing. I mean how do you expect me to memorize the Duggar-esque family tree and all of it’s names or go for a long backyard pass completely sober? You must be out of your minds… “go home you’re drunk.”

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Okay its offish! The recap is here, we’re headed into hometowns and sh!t’s getting weird. Like Dylan rocking a ponytail, Marcus owning more than one pink shirt and Brian suffering from like the worst stress induced rosacea ever, weird. But don’t worry guys – it’s not like Chris Harrison paying a visit adds more pressure or anything…

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It only took me a whole day to recover from the “Say bye to JJ” episode that left him and the cabbage patch kid rose less. More to come on our favorite childhood doll and pants lover but for now things are getting real. After this week we’re down to the Top 6 and Andi is starting to fall but for who? Well after the all the “lip locking and lies” it’s anyone’s game…

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I debated writing this post in French but you know when Chris Harrison greets you at a French café in Marseille and botches words like Bienvenue – he means business… There should be statues erected in this man’s honor glorifying his dating coach skills. Cutting straight to the chase – “Are you falling in love Andi?” aka. “My coffee is cold and this turtleneck is itchy.”

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